A Funny Thing Happened in the ER

So, remember all that abdominal pain I was having? I'd been at the ER once for a ruptured ovarian cyst and then later was treated for a duodenal ulcer. Well one day after Labor Day, I woke up and was having abdominal pain AGAIN, but different. And was kind of weirdly bloated and was nauseous and could barely get out of bed.

Glenn was pretty worried by this point and carted me off to the ER. We should have waited and gone to the doctor, but things had been so weird and not really definitively diagnosed with my health, we didn't know what was what anymore. I was feeling mostly doomed; since no test had shown anything evil I was convinced I had some weird, hard-to-find cancer or something.

We were nervous in the ER waiting room, and so as they made announcements over the loudspeaker we were making jokes to keep things light. "Baby Call, Line 5," they announced, and I leaned over and said "They're going to need a translator for that one." Then it was: "Acute Stroke, Line 8." We both looked at each other, shook our heads in mock disapproval and said what a terrible thing to name your kid that was.

So then we finally met with a doctor (after they taken blood, urine, etc. from me) and he told us I did show signs of a growth. A HUMAN GROWTH. The kind that gets removed 9 months later! Sometime around when I was being treated for an ulcer, I'd conceived (like the true masochist I am). We of course immediately decided our kid's name should be Acute Stroke.

I then got wheeled around on a stretcher for an ultrasound on which we could see there was um, some gray stuff. Oh, and a dot. I then was left on the stretcher in the hall of the ER for a couple of hours (during which time I busted a crime in progress -- needle theft -- and spoke to hospital security for their report an hour later, still in the gown, still on the stretcher, still in the hall).

Eventually (nine and a half hours after we'd arrived…) a new doctor walked by and said "okay, we should get you out of here, you've got an intrauterine pregnancy" while walking by. Glenn and I both shouted "WHAT?" and then we remembered that in-the-uterus was Good, and where it was supposed to be, and cracked up. I yelled "um, yeah okay, but so why have I had so many months of abdominal pain?!" He just shrugged.

So, Acute Stroke has already been on TV (ultrasound) three times. Once in the ER, once to verify it was a solo act as there was some indication AS could have a twin, and once to check for any early signs of Downs (no signs found). The last time we watched Baby TV, the little shrimp was doing a pretty good imitation of the infamous Dancing Baby. ETA = early May.

So here's where I need your advice: I have a good three month window starting this week to take a trip somewhere. I'm considering the Caribbean, since it's warm at this time, is in the same time zone as New England and not too far of a flight. I need your suggestions. I will be tired. I enjoy nature, like seeing parrots and snorkeling with fish and seeing whales, and I would travel just to eat something interesting. I'm not into party spots or too much time lying in the sun. I can't hike as far as usual. So, help the preggy lady out! Where should I go for my "babymoon?"